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Confidence

I took a little break from sharing to get used to my new normal.  A week ago I had to have some blood work done and for the first time in my memory I engaged in the process.  Usually I would be sick from nervousness for days before.  I would avoid and postpone.  I would get to the blood draw place and start to panic.  When it came time for the blood draw I would disassociate stare at the corner of the room trying not to start hyperventilating.  With encouragement from both Blue and Cat I engaged.  I explained to the phlebotomist that I have an irrational fear of needles and how that is driven by my OCD.  She was wonderful.  She said "Let's talk! What do you want to talk about?" and we started talking.  She let me look at the needle and the vials.  And I watched!  I watched her prepare the needle and insert it into my arm.  I watched my blood flow into the vial and as she changed to each new one.  Finally, I watched he...

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